How to win in life.

Who set the rules in the world? People. 

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Who are those people? Just humans. 

Why do we follow the rules? 

Because it’s easier to follow than to break them and take the risk of failing. 

Who said what’s good and what’s bad? 

Who the hell invented the game? 

Why aren’t we questioning absolutely everything all day every day? 

Because it can be exhausting to realise that those rules are ethereal, that we are caged by our mindsets, that we could be whatever we wanted and yet, here we are, playing the game like everybody else. 

You know why I love the entrepreneur journey? Because apart from being a self discovery journey, it activates the power of creativity, you have to figure out ways of making things happen with what you have, you become your best asset, work on yourself, take risks and chances, see opportunities everywhere, learn from every interaction and realise that false pride takes you nowhere. 

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I am learning to listen, to help others, to be selfish, to be hungry, to be observant, to play my rules and find my game. I am learning that this attitude can be applied to anything in life. I am learning what it means to make myself proud and be proud of it! 

I have learned that when you are the CEO of your life, your habits, mindset and attitude will create the culture of what you are building so better have your mind right and work your ass off for the right reasons!

I have learned to think higher. To read books and take what resonates with me. To listen to others and still do my way if I feel it’s the right thing for me. 

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In the end, no-one can tell you how to live your life because we are all figuring out ways to live better, no-one is right or wrong, it’s simply different and it’s your choice what you make with the time you have been given. 

Mirror those who you admire, ask for help, get a mentor, follow the systems that work so that you can break the system that doesn’t. 

And you shouldn’t care of what people think because big dreams will always seem crazy to small minds so filter who you listen to and keep working towards them. 

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

Follow your heart!

Follow your heart, yes, but when to know what’s really your heart and not another game of the mind? 

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Following your heart is tuning in to what makes you feel most alive, no matter what that is, if you could be doing that without being paid, for hours, without thinking when it’s going to end, but wishing that you could be doing that forever, then that’s your purpose. And it doesn’t have to make sense for anyone else but you. 

Your purpose can, may and will change. It’s called growth and evolution!

For me following my heart has taken me to travel around the world, trying to understand why I had so much hunger inside that nothing seemed to fulfill, my mind wandering, and my soul guiding a path that I couldn’t see clear but took the first steps and here I am. In London, writing a blog, growing as a person and becoming the woman I dreamed of. 

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Following my heart has taken me to experience life and open my mind to new dimensions, being courageous enough to walk alone and learning to think by myself. 

Following my heart was messy in the beginning, I didn’t know what would happen but my strong desire to conquer is guiding my steps and I am grateful because the plan is bigger than what we can imagine. 

Why you should follow your heart? 

Because you aren’t born to settle, to limit yourself to the walls your mind is trapped, because there are limitless experiences out there for you to enjoy and it’s all in your hands. 

Because you aren’t born to be mediocre, to fit in, to be normal. 

Why? 

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Because you have life in your lungs and you must fight for that life like it’s the end of the world. 

And it really doesn’t matter, the main point is challenging yourself to make something happen. Little did I know that from the moment that the idea of the festival came to me it would become a reality. 

That’s how it works, you set a goal and find ways to make it a reality. 

It could be doing a course, changing your habits, starting a fitness journey, grabbing a backpack and exploring Asia, telling someone that you like them, quitting a full time job to pursue a passion, starting that side hustle that could bring you more money than you could have ever imagined, moving to a new country…endless possibilities!

My tips: 

  • Write down a list of things you would like to do and start right now to work towards making them come true.
  • Be willing to get out of your confort zone and learn new things. 
  • Erase the “I know this already”, “been there, done that” from your head because every experience is unique.
  • Let this sink in you: fear is an illusion and this game is for you to win and grow into your best self! 

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

How to define your “perfection”.

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There is no box, you are confined only by the walls you set for yourself and I am more and more aware of all the conditioning and limitations that only because I am a woman I am carrying with me and breaking through those walls is my mission. 

You know what’s perfect for me? 

Facing challenges and growing stronger from them, embracing change and allowing myself to make mistakes and learn from them. 

If you want to be perfect you will be your whole life chasing something that’s not real but in that chasing you will grow and become an amazing being capable of leaving a legacy for the world. 

Progress not perfection they say. For me it’s the hunger of perfection what keeps me going.

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For some the concept of perfection will be stressful, for others it will be like fuel, burning the wheels and pushing them to new levels of life.  

Be bold enough to find your voice and follow that, whatever it takes, it’s your life in the end. And remember that it’s all a matter of perception, if you stop wishing to please others and instead focus on pleasing your self, your reality will start to change. 

Commit to that and your life story will be a whole different one. 

Perfection? 

We might never reach it but we will give our all at least and make it. 

EXERCISE 9: 

  • challenge yourself to something new every now and then, I recommend every week is a good start .
  • face a fear and see that actually it was all in your head.
  • be honest with yourself and recognise when you set a goal and failed to complete it, try again and know that you can do whatever you set mind to.
  • accept your imperfections and realise that some traits can be improved and others make you YOU.
  • take a deep breath and continue moving forward!

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

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How to stop being a people pleaser.

We are taught to be nice, kind, compassionate, caring, nurturing and all those glossy and sugarcoated traditions.

We aren’t meant to be noisy, loud or stand out too much, no good man will like you if you are overdoing, if you are over sexy, if you go for what you want. You are bossy and you intimidate men! 

We have been told that powerful women intimidate men our whole life. WAKE UP! We are not here to please anybody but us and that’s the biggest service we can give to the world!

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Fuck being nice for a day! Do whatever you want! Risk making others angry and don’t care! SAY NO when you mean it!

Saying no and having an attitude is different. Saying no means you are being true to yourself and you are choosing yourself before anybody else. 

Some call it selfish, I call it self love! 

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Learning to say no when it’s hard is when you really win. Saying no means you will piss off people but if you keep on pleasing people you won’t get far. 

This goes to every time we feel something in our stomach telling us not to go one way and we still go that way.

All those times when we know we have let someone else decide our moves we are giving our power away. And later we have the courage to blame others!

Where we are in life is product of the choices we made in the past and if we keep looking back and thinking that we could have done something different instead of using every experience as a steeping stone for our future we are already dead.

I have heard them all, I used to have many of this excuses in me. WHAT IF?

WHAT

IF

YOU 

START 

FACING 

THE 

UGLY

TRUTH 

AND CREATING A LIFE YOU LOVE? NOW! 

Being nice means you will put others before you choose yourself and yes, some of you might be married, with kids, divorced, lost, unemployed…name it…well, there is always a way out…if you are willing to put in the work, know yourself and make the right moves now.

Being nice with others and then faking being nice with ourselves when what we need is a kick in the ass…that’s lame!

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Do you want to get somewhere? Go out there and make it! 

Do you want to live a life worth watching when you are about to leave this planet? Go out there and go for it! 

FUCK BEING NICE! 

Why are we nice? Because we want others to love us, to approve us, to say: wow you are so nice! So great! So amazing! 

We look for constant approval instead of playing the game, life is playing it on us.

We allow others to decide when and where, how and what.

Without questioning.

Without taking the step back to question ourselves, our actions, our reality, our situation.

Then we go to therapy, we blame our parents, our environment, we blame our bad choices, our mistakes, if in the past I hadn’t done that I wouldn’t be where I am right now!

BS! 

Every journey is different, every single life is different, every person is different, every story has to be different and you are where you are right now, life is pushing your buttons the way it is right now, for you, YES YOU! To act accordingly.

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There are few steps in gaining control over your life and every story is different, this may resonate with some and it may hit others so hard that they will hate it, so be it.

Gaining control over your life is understanding that this game was made for us to become stronger and wiser, standing up challenge after challenge and building a mind muscle to lead our lives with the joy and freedom we deserve. 

Being nice means you are part of the pack, those who are really nice don’t follow the crowd, they do them, they do their thing, they are nice when they want and when they don’t feel like it they are just them, true and authentic, if it hurts someone’s ego they don’t bother, they don’t fight battles that aren’t worth their time, they build their empires and walk their path.

Being nice means you will sacrifice your life for others and there is no bigger disservice than being so nice that you find yourself at 80 years old thinking what the fuck did I do, where did all that time go, where is everybody now? All those big favours that you did? Gone! Under water.

You are nice with yourself, in the mirror, owning your personality, being hard, becoming stronger, and then projecting that energy into the world, that’s how you inspire!

CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES WISELY! 

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This is life, this isn’t a test or a Disney movie. This is the harsh reality and we better step up and own it or remain the same and blame our environment for not being who we dream to be.

THE BIGGEST COMPETITION YOU WILL HAVE TO BATTLE IS LOOKING RIGHT BACK AT YOU IN THE MIRROR EVERY SINGLE DAY! THAT’S YOUR FIGHT! IN YOUR MIND! 

Someone asks you a favour and you are not in the mood? Say no, with a smile, no excuses and no explanations, don’t justify your no. Just say NO and that’s a complete sentence.

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

To be continued next Tuesday…;) 

How to elevate your vibration.

Observe when you are about to fall down the trap of blaming others of your luck, when you are about to talk bad about a colleague, when you are about to share a negative thing that happened, when you are giving more than one thought to a situation that annoyed you, laugh it of, don’t fight it, simply move your attention towards something else, think Holy guacamoly! Again? and laugh!

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Treat these actions like you would treat your inner kid, with love but when you are teaching something you must be firm and determined, you know what’s best for you, give it to yourself.

Bitching can be against ourselves as well, for example right now I am writing these posts and I am thinking who the fuck am I to be sharing these thoughts with you?

Something inside me holds me back, you know what? Fear of failing! But if I don’t try I have already failed by default. 

Stop complaining about things and realise that things aren’t the way you would like because you are learning, every journey has it’s own pace and as long as you keep aiming for greatness all is good.

If you wake up every morning with the determination to rise above your limitations you will eventually get it done, if the desire in your heart to overcome your struggle is stronger than your laziness then you will make things happen and find ways to make them happen. 

Today is a day to focus in all the good in your life, see everything not as a stuck point but as a stepping stone. 

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Everything is in your life for you to outgrow your yesterday’s self. It’s for you to outplay and outwork every version of yourself who doesn’t believe dreams do come true. 

EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE HAPPENS FOR YOU TO LEARN AND EVOLVE! 

The problem is that we want to be part of the pack and being part of the pack we settle, we try to fit in so desperately that we loose our spark, we allow ourselves to be dragged to parties we don’t feel like going, we jump into relationships that feel off from the beginning because we are scared of being left out, we are so scared of being alone and lonely that we don’t take time to know ourselves and we accept wherever life throws at us, we sit there, waiting, waiting, waiting, for things to fall into place when the reality is, things will only fall into place when we jump and take risks. 

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Today the risk is being called grumpy, crazy, bad friend, and loads of other things. People will “worry”, they will try to call you back to the pack, you simply stay in your lane and see how your thoughts drift, how you put still the blame on those around you, how you are giving your power away.

Letting go of people you have been hanging around for a while isn’t easy, you are used to the behaviours you share, you feel guilty and a bad person for putting yourself first, they will say you are selfish, that you are thinking you are someone, that those heights where you are going are unknown for them, that you have changed and you are a different person now!

That was the whole point, baby! Change or die! 

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Let me repeat something that I said in the previous posts: everything we get in the outside world is a reflection of what’s going on in the inside world. 

Why do some people get what they want easy and others seem to continuously struggle through life?

Because of their beliefs. The experiences we get are repeating patterns until we see the pattern and take a different action.

What have I learned? Alex Vermeer quotes How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie:

“Criticism is very unlikely to be effective, because it will just put people on the defensive. As Carnegie says,

“Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.”

Carnegie then presents several examples of criticism going bad, and follows it up with saying,

“Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain—and most fools do.
But it takes great character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.”

He ends the chapter with the following paragraph,

“Instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them. Let’s try to figure out why they do what they do. That’s a lot more profitable and intriguing that criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness.”

We waste too much time complaining of how things have gone wrong in the past, how things go wrong now and how everything is against us all day every day. 

That negativity is poison!

Complaints are infused with the role of the victim who has no choice but to continue the same chain of facts that keeps them trapped in a reality that they don’t like.

Well, let me tell you that, YOU DO HAVE A CHOICE!

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CHANGE OR REMAIN THE SAME! 

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

 

To be continued…next Tuesday 😉 

How to increase your confidence.

Life is a game, it all starts in your mind, it all starts within.

The results you are getting in the outside world are a mirror of your mindset. When you hear “stretch your mind” means let your walls down, admit that you might be mistaken and that there might be other ways of getting what you want.

What we get is usually tied to what we think we deserve, how we see ourselves is what we are getting from the world.

If you think you don’t deserve more that mediocre results in any level of your life, that’s what you will get.

When you upgrade your confidence and actually see that you can become whatever you want then life will transform for you and your experience will be enriched by more and more pleasant situations and new people who will bring new energies.

And it all starts within, it all starts by accepting the reflection in the mirror.

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Facing our reflection is facing our fears, seeing how we have been living by what others may think, comparing our bodies with others, deciding our self worth based on someone else’s standards, instead of accepting ourselves we are placing our value in the hands of others.

We might have smaller boobs, bigger booty, smaller or bigger waist…whatever! Everything is possible, you change your mindset, you love yourself enough to wake up and take action towards a more healthy way of living, you hit the gym hard and build a body you are proud of!

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But nothing outside you can give you the confidence you need. First love your body how it looks now and then do the changes you want, surround yourself with people who will push you to the next level, model them, get inspired and become who you really are.

Try this and walk the street with confidence, no headphones, and you will see what happens 😉 

We take little time of the day to really see ourselves and when we do is through the lenses of others, comparing our progress with the lives of others.

Take a deep breath!

YOU ARE EXACTLY where you are meant to be! 

YOU CAN! 

YOU WILL!

YOU ARE doing this! 

FOR YOU! 

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Do you want more success in your career? Go for it! 

Do you want a different life? Go create it! 

Do you want more money? Go make it! 

Do you want love? Go love yourself! 

Do you want passionate sex? Make love to yourself until you are exhausted! 

That body you are not loving enough is the temple of your soul, it will reflect your mindset and your self projection. 

You are here to evolve, no rush, time is yours and you deserve this time for you.

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

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To be continued…next Tuesday 😉 

How to define love for yourself.

I have read this a few times “love starts within” and I couldn’t grasp what it really meant.

Let’s leave aside the word/concept of love, will write an article with my thoughts on that topic a bit later.

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But what does that statement mean? If you have parts of yourself that need attention and healing you will attract people in your life who will act in ways that will push all your buttons until you decide once and for all to check your inner world.

Self love has to be a discipline, self love is not half ass makeup, get a personal trainer, buy new clothes or change your habits. Self love is facing the “good”* and the “ugly”* and being ok with it. 

*who decides what is good and what is right for you? who decides what is good and what is ugly? 

The only way to see another person truly is by being true to yourself, then you can understand what someone else might be going through. But most important, you start to comprehend why you do the things you do, why some things happen the way they do and you gain your power back, day by day, little by little.

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If we expect someone else to fix us, we are doomed. 

If we expect someone else to complete us, we are insane. 

If we expect someone else to give us the love we want, we are being dishonest. 

If we expect from others what we are not willing to give to ourselves we are settling for less than we deserve and signing a contract with pain. Over and over again. 

Love must start in our core, being selfish with our time and space, with our company.

Love yourself so deeply that you don’t care anymore about what other people might think, you speak your truth, even when it hurts.

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Love yourself so deeply that you embrace both light and dark and allow yourself to experience life in your own terms.

Love yourself so much that you invest in your wellbeing first and foremost, that you explore your depths through meditation and test the external world to conquer your fears.

Love yourself so much that you question your taboos and beliefs daily and make the adjustments you want to get the experiences that you want to live.

Love yourself so much that you go for what you want. Classy but, RUTHLESSLY! 

Love is a concept. And it all starts in how you see yourself!

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You are worthy of love and belonging.

But first of all, do you belong to yourself?

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED.