The #1 obstacle I faced when starting my business was…

The #1 obstacle I faced when starting my business was…believing in myself enough to know that I could really do this thing called my own business and stopping procrastination. 

Can you relate to the overwhelming feeling of entering the unknown world of having your own business?: 

  • Will I be delivering a good enough service?
  • Will this work?
  • Will people even buy?
  • How do I ask for money for something that comes so natural to me?
  • What if they say no?
  • Do I have enough experience to take this risk?
  • I don’t know anything about business, how am I going to make this work?
  • How do I find my clients?
  • How will I tell them to buy from me?
  • Why is so difficult to make money?
  • Why am I always frustrated?
  • Will I always be busy and never have time for the things that matter to me?
  • What if I succeed and this is not what I want to do for the rest of my life?
  • Where do I start?
  • What happens if I make a mistake?
  • Will I be able to I leave my full time job?
  • HOW DO I MAKE MONEY?

The more you look for answers in books, blogs and other people’s experiences the worst it gets, anxiety takes over and leaves you completely paralysed full of FEAR.

Are you afraid of THINKING BIG?

Do you think being successful means being stressed, busy and not having time for the things you like the most and the people you love? 

Everything takes you to the same frustrating question:

“What are they doing that I am not to make this business a success?”

Last year I was stuck. I had been trying different businesses for years, going to seminars, reading books and blogs, asking people for opinion, until I decided it was time for a change and decided to ask for an expert’s help.

The only thing that has consistently helped is personalised advice on my exact situation from someone that has been there before me.

Sometimes you just need someone to tell you exactly what to do. 


Over the last year I have been offering 1:1 coaching sessions to entrepreneurs, like you and me, who struggle with the same fears, blocks and mindset limitations I once did too.

 

Here some of the disciplines that are helping them overcome their blocks, among others:

  1. Meditation: it brings clarity and helps you stay grounded when things go different than expected.
  2. Prioritising tasks and have tos, must dos: our endless to do lists can improve our lives if we simplify, focus and prioritise by blocking tasks with deadlines and outsourcing.
  3. Being selfish and putting themselves first at the beginning of their to do list.

Simply by choosing our personal wellbeing before any social commitment relieves the stress and helps us focus in what matters for our business, our lives and overall success.

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

How to captivate with your story.

Write it boldly! 

No one is going to give you what you want, you have to go out there and hunt, don’t ever expect others to help you getting what you want and you won’t suffer deception. 

This is a game, the game is set for each of us to learn and grow and evolve. 

Take it as a movie where you are the main character, the director and the script writer.

Start writing and be BOLD, be brave, share your journey in the most compelling, creative, inspiring, motivational and amazing way you can possibly create.

Do it for you and you will WIN!

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You decide, you observe, you learn, you make your moves, you grow, you fall, you rise, you stand strong, you become and you move the pieces across the board. 

You create you opportunities and once the opportunity comes you take it and learn how to make the most of it. 

You can ask for advice but in the end you have to build up enough strength and confidence to know what you want and make it happen on your own. 

You can help others but always remember to help yourself first.

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Also remember that the people you ask advice from are also people, humans like you and if you don’t take your own risks you will never grow. Listen, learn from those who are where you would like to be but be bold enough to try your own way, the worst thing that can happen is that you learn another way that doesn’t work and you build up confidence from getting out of your comfort zone. 

Everybody is going to help you, it all depends on your perception, if you listen and observe you realise that actually every single thing is moving you forward and the only one holding back is yourself. 

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From some you will learn how to be witty, from others how to treat people, from others how not to treat people, from some you will learn how to be more communicative, from others you will learn how to be strong, from some you will learn to be honest with yourself, from others you will learn how to set healthy boundaries, from others how to ask for help, from others how to love, from some you will learn how to let go, from some you will learn how to forgive, from some you will learn how to say what you really want and be crystal clear, from some you will learn how to flirt, from others you will learn about business, money and persuasion. From every single interaction you will learn more and more about yourself. 

In the end, you realise we are all learning along the way, experimenting with what we have and nobody is perfect. 

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

xx

Arya

How to win in life.

Who set the rules in the world? People. 

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Who are those people? Just humans. 

Why do we follow the rules? 

Because it’s easier to follow than to break them and take the risk of failing. 

Who said what’s good and what’s bad? 

Who the hell invented the game? 

Why aren’t we questioning absolutely everything all day every day? 

Because it can be exhausting to realise that those rules are ethereal, that we are caged by our mindsets, that we could be whatever we wanted and yet, here we are, playing the game like everybody else. 

You know why I love the entrepreneur journey? Because apart from being a self discovery journey, it activates the power of creativity, you have to figure out ways of making things happen with what you have, you become your best asset, work on yourself, take risks and chances, see opportunities everywhere, learn from every interaction and realise that false pride takes you nowhere. 

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I am learning to listen, to help others, to be selfish, to be hungry, to be observant, to play my rules and find my game. I am learning that this attitude can be applied to anything in life. I am learning what it means to make myself proud and be proud of it! 

I have learned that when you are the CEO of your life, your habits, mindset and attitude will create the culture of what you are building so better have your mind right and work your ass off for the right reasons!

I have learned to think higher. To read books and take what resonates with me. To listen to others and still do my way if I feel it’s the right thing for me. 

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In the end, no-one can tell you how to live your life because we are all figuring out ways to live better, no-one is right or wrong, it’s simply different and it’s your choice what you make with the time you have been given. 

Mirror those who you admire, ask for help, get a mentor, follow the systems that work so that you can break the system that doesn’t. 

And you shouldn’t care of what people think because big dreams will always seem crazy to small minds so filter who you listen to and keep working towards them. 

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

How to define your “perfection”.

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There is no box, you are confined only by the walls you set for yourself and I am more and more aware of all the conditioning and limitations that only because I am a woman I am carrying with me and breaking through those walls is my mission. 

You know what’s perfect for me? 

Facing challenges and growing stronger from them, embracing change and allowing myself to make mistakes and learn from them. 

If you want to be perfect you will be your whole life chasing something that’s not real but in that chasing you will grow and become an amazing being capable of leaving a legacy for the world. 

Progress not perfection they say. For me it’s the hunger of perfection what keeps me going.

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For some the concept of perfection will be stressful, for others it will be like fuel, burning the wheels and pushing them to new levels of life.  

Be bold enough to find your voice and follow that, whatever it takes, it’s your life in the end. And remember that it’s all a matter of perception, if you stop wishing to please others and instead focus on pleasing your self, your reality will start to change. 

Commit to that and your life story will be a whole different one. 

Perfection? 

We might never reach it but we will give our all at least and make it. 

EXERCISE 9: 

  • challenge yourself to something new every now and then, I recommend every week is a good start .
  • face a fear and see that actually it was all in your head.
  • be honest with yourself and recognise when you set a goal and failed to complete it, try again and know that you can do whatever you set mind to.
  • accept your imperfections and realise that some traits can be improved and others make you YOU.
  • take a deep breath and continue moving forward!

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

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How to stop being a people pleaser.

We are taught to be nice, kind, compassionate, caring, nurturing and all those glossy and sugarcoated traditions.

We aren’t meant to be noisy, loud or stand out too much, no good man will like you if you are overdoing, if you are over sexy, if you go for what you want. You are bossy and you intimidate men! 

We have been told that powerful women intimidate men our whole life. WAKE UP! We are not here to please anybody but us and that’s the biggest service we can give to the world!

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Fuck being nice for a day! Do whatever you want! Risk making others angry and don’t care! SAY NO when you mean it!

Saying no and having an attitude is different. Saying no means you are being true to yourself and you are choosing yourself before anybody else. 

Some call it selfish, I call it self love! 

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Learning to say no when it’s hard is when you really win. Saying no means you will piss off people but if you keep on pleasing people you won’t get far. 

This goes to every time we feel something in our stomach telling us not to go one way and we still go that way.

All those times when we know we have let someone else decide our moves we are giving our power away. And later we have the courage to blame others!

Where we are in life is product of the choices we made in the past and if we keep looking back and thinking that we could have done something different instead of using every experience as a steeping stone for our future we are already dead.

I have heard them all, I used to have many of this excuses in me. WHAT IF?

WHAT

IF

YOU 

START 

FACING 

THE 

UGLY

TRUTH 

AND CREATING A LIFE YOU LOVE? NOW! 

Being nice means you will put others before you choose yourself and yes, some of you might be married, with kids, divorced, lost, unemployed…name it…well, there is always a way out…if you are willing to put in the work, know yourself and make the right moves now.

Being nice with others and then faking being nice with ourselves when what we need is a kick in the ass…that’s lame!

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Do you want to get somewhere? Go out there and make it! 

Do you want to live a life worth watching when you are about to leave this planet? Go out there and go for it! 

FUCK BEING NICE! 

Why are we nice? Because we want others to love us, to approve us, to say: wow you are so nice! So great! So amazing! 

We look for constant approval instead of playing the game, life is playing it on us.

We allow others to decide when and where, how and what.

Without questioning.

Without taking the step back to question ourselves, our actions, our reality, our situation.

Then we go to therapy, we blame our parents, our environment, we blame our bad choices, our mistakes, if in the past I hadn’t done that I wouldn’t be where I am right now!

BS! 

Every journey is different, every single life is different, every person is different, every story has to be different and you are where you are right now, life is pushing your buttons the way it is right now, for you, YES YOU! To act accordingly.

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There are few steps in gaining control over your life and every story is different, this may resonate with some and it may hit others so hard that they will hate it, so be it.

Gaining control over your life is understanding that this game was made for us to become stronger and wiser, standing up challenge after challenge and building a mind muscle to lead our lives with the joy and freedom we deserve. 

Being nice means you are part of the pack, those who are really nice don’t follow the crowd, they do them, they do their thing, they are nice when they want and when they don’t feel like it they are just them, true and authentic, if it hurts someone’s ego they don’t bother, they don’t fight battles that aren’t worth their time, they build their empires and walk their path.

Being nice means you will sacrifice your life for others and there is no bigger disservice than being so nice that you find yourself at 80 years old thinking what the fuck did I do, where did all that time go, where is everybody now? All those big favours that you did? Gone! Under water.

You are nice with yourself, in the mirror, owning your personality, being hard, becoming stronger, and then projecting that energy into the world, that’s how you inspire!

CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES WISELY! 

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This is life, this isn’t a test or a Disney movie. This is the harsh reality and we better step up and own it or remain the same and blame our environment for not being who we dream to be.

THE BIGGEST COMPETITION YOU WILL HAVE TO BATTLE IS LOOKING RIGHT BACK AT YOU IN THE MIRROR EVERY SINGLE DAY! THAT’S YOUR FIGHT! IN YOUR MIND! 

Someone asks you a favour and you are not in the mood? Say no, with a smile, no excuses and no explanations, don’t justify your no. Just say NO and that’s a complete sentence.

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

To be continued next Tuesday…;) 

How to grow from change.

Move to a new city! Seriously 😉

When I moved to London I knew that I wanted to build a company, I had no clue about business and what it really meant but I knew what I wanted to learn and all my intentions where towards that goal.

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Moving to a new country can be scary but I had traveled around the world, mostly solo for almost a year and a half and I have siblings here so that made things a bit easier.

But the challenges are what makes us grow and I had to figure out ways of living here while finding my way, from house sitting to sharing flat with friends and family, sleeping in a mattress on the floor, to working in the food to go section of a health store, to walking 40 minutes to take the train in the snow at 4am to sleep 5 hours and workout and eat rice and beans, all for the dream.

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Some might have had it harder, it doesn’t matter, we all face challenges in this life, we all have our battles to win and our lessons to learn, what matters here is the proof that if you want something and your are stubborn enough to follow that call you will find a way to make it happen no matter the struggle.

Victim mentality is one where you get angry, annoyed and pissed off when things don’t go your way.

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I used to hate this in others and one day I learned that I had been doing the same, nagging, whining, crying and complaining like a mediocre person would do and that’s what great people teach us, you whip your tears and stand up again no matter what happens.

Acknowledging the power within is knowing that even when things don’t go according to your plan there is a bigger plan and everything is going perfectly according to that plan.

Moving to a new country is the best learning experience you can gift to yourself.

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It took me a year to feel like I am living in London and I know I have only seen a small glimpse of what the city can give.

You will only get as far as your beliefs. You want a different reality? Challenge your beliefs and question why you have been doing things the way you are doing them.

Jump! Take risks! Do things your way because if you never try you will never know if it works for you or not.

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If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED. 

How to THINK your own thoughts.

Step out of your comfort zone and think by yourself, test your fears and choose what makes you feel more excited

You are already more aware of your thoughts and paying more attention to the world around you.

Re-gaining your power is more about understanding that the game is you, you are the player, everything outside you is only guiding you towards that next level.

EXERCISE NUMBER 5: 

Today the challenge is taking time for yourself, allowing yourself to be the first thought in your mind and the first person you think about when making a decision.

No fucks given! For real! 

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You have a dream, you are working towards it, you know what you want and YOU KNOW what you need to do to breakthrough.

Step I:

Start transforming your reality by changing something from your routine, something that scares you: cancel a meeting, take time for you to enjoy a longer lunch or gym session, leave earlier from work, go out and have dinner with someone or on your own. You don’t owe anyone an explanation, this game is yours and yours to win and play. 

What is scaring you the most? 

If you continue behaving like a slave you will continue in that mindset and nothing will change, you know that to grow you must push through the fears that come floating up: your boss might get annoyed, you will miss an opportunity of growth in your career, you will miss what?

Nothing will happen, this small act of rebellion is a clear statement to the Universe that you are committed to growing your mental strength, that you are capable of taking decisions on your own, you have a plan and that plan is following your passions wherever they take you.

I have learned that in life you give and you receive, you take and you deliver, but most of the times you realise that those in power are selfish and you have to learn to own your space, to stand up for yourself. 

It doesn’t matter if you are going to continue working in that environment or if you are looking for ways to open a new business, launch a company or whatever.

This mindset will help you gain the confidence you need to ask for what’s yours. That pay rise, to set your boundaries, to say no when you mean it, to say yes to yourself more often, you are allowing your desires to flow, you are allowing your personality to shine, by realising that actually nothing happens and it’s all in your head. If you truly believe that you deserved that extra time for you to do whatever the f*** you wanted, absolutely nothing outside you will stop you from that. 

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I did the test myself, first I wanted to be super radical and not go to work during a whole day but then out of fear I reduced the amount of hours, I was even more productive than a full shift day, I knew I was in control of my results, I was trading my time for money, yes, but I was training my mind to have the confidence to break the rules and walk outside of the office building almost 3 hours before my shift finished.

I have a huge adaptability to change, overtime I have developed the skill of knowing what’s the next best move for my development.

But it wasn’t always this way, once I had so much fear of calling to work and saying that I was sick and wouldn’t come again that literally my inner kid was terrified imagining their reaction, they would get mad at me, I wouldn’t be able to walk into that store ever again. I was literally sitting in a corner telling my sister how scared I was and she obviously was surprised, the fear was rooted deep inside and by stepping up and letting go of a work that was killing me I gained confidence.

Embracing the unknown is what we do really every day, but we are numbed by all this routines and apparent obligations. 

Step II: 

Today is the day you decide for yourself, you take again the control of your day and ASK YOURSELF:

DO I LIKE WHERE MY LIFE IS GOING? 

WHAT ELSE COULD I BE DOING THAT COULD BRING ME MORE HAPPINESS AND JOY?

The signs will be in and out, you will know what to do but you are still scared.

It’s ok.

Take a small step.

How you want your life to look like?

Is what you are doing today bringing you anywhere closer to that goal?

What could you do to get one step closer? 

Decide what will be your next action to take and start writing down a plan.

It can be as crazy as you want!

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Vision boards are an amazing tool for this, you see the clear vision of how you want your life to look like and one day if you look back you will be amazed of the power of your mind.

You can have it all!

Find books, courses, seminars, groups, anything that will help you develop the skills necessary to reach the next level of your life. 

Step III:

Getting out of your comfort zone means getting out of your head, trying new things, new ways of behaving, testing yourself and the world around you. 

Use whatever you have in hand, forget about what others may think and focus in doing everything for you.

You want to learn dance? Go, sign up! Be ridiculous, observe your thoughts, see how hard you are on yourself, how you judge yourself when you don’t know one move, see how you think others might be doing it better, see how instead of being listening to the teacher you are listening to that voice in your head saying that you are not good enough.

Well, you are learning!

Engrave this in your head: You are learning as you go. Be patient, let those thoughts be, let them float, laugh at them, laugh at yourself for being so hard and let it go. 

Laugh. Literally. Smile and laugh. You will see the energy releasing your body. And take a deep breath. Take a deep breath and walk like you mean it.

Another thing that you MUST COMPREHEND IS that everyone is human.

Step IV: 

Humanise people, humanise men, humanise women, humanise your idols, humanise the bloggers, humanise every single person, everyone around you, humanise your boss, humanise your colleagues, nobody’s perfect, everyone has insecurities, fears, is going through hardships and is battling some kind of inner struggle. 

Humanising others around you will kill the fear of interaction and will leave you more relaxed when walking the world. 

By observing people we can read them and see through the facades of confidence, we can see the emotions, we can sense what’s going on in their heads. And that makes them human.

Recap of the day: 

  • try something new;
  • break your routine and take time for yourself ;
  • face the fear of making someone else angry or annoyed; 
  • embrace that consequences and own them;
  • give yourself the time you give to others so easily;
  • question if what you are doing is taking you closer to where you want to go? and
  • write down a plan or create a vision board for the life of your dreams!

Today must have been intense, take a long shower, rest, breath and listen to your favourite music.

Observe how all those terrible situations didn’t happen and that whatever happened you where more in control because you didn’t care, you felt free of your mind restrains.

If you need to do repeat this day over again because you were too scared to break your rules, it’s ok but don’t allow it more than 3 days because then you will reinforce the belief that your life is out of your control.

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Take these exercises as an experiment for your own personal growth, to take control over the world around you, to raise to your top, to climb that mountain in front of your eyes, inside your head. 

To win this game you have to question absolutely everything, don’t take my words for truth, test them, question them and question your ways, your thoughts, your fears, question why you react and why you act the way you do. 

For the next exercise be prepared to play your game, flirt if you like, own your body, enjoy being alive, the next day will start by worshipping your image in the mirror.

Yes!

You have to gain control over your mind and that it’s also gaining control over the reflection in the mirror. 

To be continued…next Tuesday 😉

If you’d like to find out more about my programmes and how can I help you achieve the success you deserve, if you want to see what’s been holding you back all this time email me to iammissfirestar@gmail.com and let’s talk so that I can give you 30minutes of my time, some advice and a plan to move forward. 

ONLY 5 SPOTS AVAILABLE.  FIRST COME. FIRST SERVED.